On being disarmed by the beautiful
I am writing this while the almost unbearably sweet frangipani incense burns next to me. In front of my eyes, I see the lushness of the Balinese garden, a sole derelict goddess peeking from behind the leaves.
Just yesterday, I attended the launch of a book by Indonesian journalist and poet Antonia Timmerman called How Do You Want To Die? Ironically, yet unsurprisingly, Antonia’s collection of poems is not about the dead things but about the things that keep us alive and thriving despite the horrors, dramas and decay around us.
Being in Bali means coming face-to-face with its astonishing natural beauty just pouring in from every corner – the lush green of rice fields, the deep almond eyes of the locals, vibrant fruits and the crumbling but still monumental architecture. Here, I discover within myself the deep-seated longing to be my most beautiful, aligned self. I can feel it in my belly – it’s the visceral calling to let the beauty in, to be disarmed by the awe of simply being.
To me, that’s the essence of living. Like a woman obsessed, I seek these sensations daily, collecting them like precious shells and craving them when they’re absent from my life.
In his book The Gift of Beauty and the Passion of Being, William Desmond writes: “Beauty gives us a sense of the fullness of being, a gift that seems to overflow the limits of mere existence and bring us into contact with a deeper mystery."
I do feel this so deeply. Aesthetic things root us firmly in our flesh, bring us back to the core of ourselves. Did you ever notice your belly flutter at a stunning view, the beauty of a well-formed sentence, the lustre of pearls or the shimmer of the ocean? Have you ever experienced a shiver down the spine upon overhearing the birdsongs? My heart melts a few times a day at the tooth-gapped smile of my children, their youthfulness so vibrant, so innocent.
Psychologists often refer to this phenomenon as "aesthetic chills", which are believed to reflect a powerful connection between beauty and our sense of meaning or emotional resonance. Scientifically, these reactions are often driven by the release of endorphins and dopamine, which are linked to pleasure and reward, and can evoke a sense of grounding and heightened awareness of the present moment. Philosopher Gaston Bachelard suggests that beauty deeply felt makes us more ‘porous’, allowing the world to enter us and creating a sense of being deeply connected to it. In Desmond's words, “beauty communicates with us through the awakened porosity”.
Here in Bali, it really feels as though beauty drips from the top of the universe, saturating every cell.
I’ve always felt sensitive to the world’s beauty but only allowed myself to fully open to it a few years ago when I experienced the profound beauty of becoming a mother—it was a true awakening, on both emotional and cellular levels.
Because beauty is more than just an aesthetic experience; it is a profound opening into the sacred, it’s bathing in happy hormones while reconnecting with your primal energy. In beauty, we glimpse the infinite, and through it, we connect to the transcendent nature of everything around us.
So, let yourself bathe in the beauty of everyday moments. Not every single one will be blissful, but if you collect the little beads of sweetness, by the end of the day, you’ll have a beautiful necklace (pun intended!).
A few beautiful things on my mind recently
— I can’t stop marvelling at this stunning Golden Porcupine Calcite Cluster from Java, Indonesia. Orange calcite boosts vitality, unlocks sexual energy and it’s also been known to increase fertility. What a powerful combo for this Scorpio season!
— The ethereal sounds of Chantress Seba, also known as Gemini, a UK-born artist of African, Indian and Celtic ancestry. She is celebrated for her spiritual music performances, particularly those involving light language, a vocal style that channels energy and healing frequencies.
— I’ve just discovered this Balinese Frangipani Incense – an absolutely stunning smell perfect for balmy mornings and evenings while reading, thinking, writing or practising gentle movement.
— I made this pink opal-pearl necklace to order, but it is so stunning that I’ve decided to put it up on the website too. Just a few pieces are available.
